Fear

Lurking behind the eyelids
Peeking through
Struggling to jump out of
The recesses of my mind
Muffled and pushed back again

Telling me to attack now
Then urging me to flee
Compelling me to lie
Convincing me to deceive

Making my feet go numb
Making me feel
The ice in my spine
Towering over my existence
Making me smaller everyday

You make me what I am
You made me what I was
You are my twin
I never conceded

Into my own shell
I always receded
Only to be pushed by you again
Pushed always

Sometimes I think how life would be
If I could just strangle you
And be free
Step out of your shadow forever

But I know I must have you
To keep alive
To go on living
To protect myself
And those I love