On friends and friendships

Got this as a forwarded email:

Bonding with your gal pals is the best way to deal with life's ups and downs, here are six types that every woman relies on for advice and emotion support

We need different friends to fulfill different needs. Some make good counsellors, others are good listeners and some are miss fix-its. Each one plays an important role in our lives, and we cannot do without them. Here are six types of friends every woman needs in her life.

The new friend:

As much as we love our old friends, it's always nice to meet new people and add them to your friends list. New friends add a spark to your life, and help you re-evaluate your world, adding a new perspective to your life. They inspire and excite you, motivating you to get out of the routine and try something new.

The counsellor:

Can't afford a shrink? She is your best bet. She will listen to all your problems and offer you sound advice without being critical or judgmental of your situation. You can rant about the problems you are having at work, in your relationship or with any situation that requires your attention.

The strong as a rock friend:

She has been there with you like a solid rock in the ups and downs of your life. She knows you better than anybody and has seen and handled your various mood swings. You have had your share of fights, arguments and misunderstandings and have worked your way through it. You love each other and are inseparable.

The fun friend:

This one knows how to have a great time and she is the one who does not mind adding that crazy energy to your life. She always knows where the happening parties are and does not believe in getting home till the sun rises.

The honest one:

She will not say things to please you, and will not shy away from telling you the truth no matter what.

The mother hen:

She is the one you go to when in need for some TLC. She is gentle and comforting and will fix you a quick meal when your feeling down in the dumps. She will not lecture you, but will comfort you like a mother.

This got me thinking – what kind of friend am I? I am not a mother hen. I am not ‘the fun friend’. The shrink? I can listen and give advice, but with a caveat – it may not be sound; I give, ‘use at your own risk’ kinda advice. I am honest, generally speaking, but I don’t believe in ‘hurt the other person’ kind of honesty. So if you look fat, don’t ask me if you do, because I’ll never say yes.

I don’t know what I inspire as a new friend, ‘creative ways to avoid new people’ maybe. I am a bad new friend. Most of time, I am faking it. I am losing interest in getting to know new people – just takes too much energy and they soon show some side of them that I dislike. Dear god, am I turning into a misanthrope?

Looks like I don’t fit anywhere on this list. Does that mean, I am no friend at all? O_o

I have been wondering, this disinterest in making new friendships - is it me or is it them?

That day

Image source: http://www.1st-art-gallery.com/thumbnail/227566/1/Woman-With-A-Mask.jpg

That day

I didn’t have the courage

To say, ‘Don’t.’

That day

I hid my face and

And today

As I step into my closet

To hang another face,

My eyes wander to that one,

The one with

The shame of cowardice

Writ large,

Stowed behind cobwebs

Of escapism.

I pull it out

And hang it away with

Myriad other faces:

The caricature of bonhomie

The grimace of being me…

One day

I’ll have courage again

To pick it up

Stroke it,

Own it, and say,

‘Yes, I was a coward

But I am who I am.’

And from that day on,

I will have no more

Need for facades